May 2011 Archives

Memorial Day: Enter Hitler, Release 2.0


1156 Comments

     As the sage Robert Crumb once remarked about our homeland: "You can't make this shit up."       Sarah Palin entered the race for president this week (without stating it in so many words) with a national bus tour, itself kicked off with a motorcycle parade through Washington.By PHILIP ELLIOTT, Associated Press - Sun May 29, 5:57 pm ETWASHINGTON - Sarah Palin rumbled through Washington on the back of a Harley as she and...

Get Real


783 Comments

     Americans gathered around the hearth of CBS's 60 Minutes must have been bemused to hear reporter Scott Pelley announce self-importantly that the US Department of Justice is investigating Lance Armstrong's bicycling team for performance-enhancing drug use. Does it really matter if any pro athlete takes drugs? Why not throw Babe Ruth out of the Baseball Hall of Fame for drinking sixteen beers the night before a World Series opener? Or Ditto Mickey Mantle...

A Flea In His Ear


733 Comments

     Imagine the fright mask that the Sofitel Hotel maid's face turned into when a black swan in the form of an international banking poobah waddled out of the suite's bathroom with wings rampant. Black swans appear now in the unlikeliest places. I bet you a million Euros that Dominque Strauss-Kahn's lawyer will say that his client was driven mad by relentless, revolving, unresolvable thoughts of Greece, Portugal, Ireland, and Spain, and that he...

The Song of Spring


764 Comments

     This is a nervous country. I'm not sure that hanging Osama Bin Laden on the White House wall like a coonskin really helps that much. Already, a familiar darkness sets back in, a loss of purpose of the kind that Lindsay Lohan must feel when she gets out of rehab. This is exactly the situation that empty rhetoric was designed for, so we got a week of talk about "bringing our nation together"...

Lying Is the New Normal


784 Comments

    Mark these words: within about three hours, the "Birther" faction around America will be asking for Osama Bin Laden's driver's license. What I'd like to know is how come he was "buried at sea," when the operation took place at least a thousand miles from the sea. Did the US Navy Seals transfer his remains from a helicopter to a boat? Or to an airplane? And did they just drop him over the night-darkened...
 
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