March 2023 | Eyesore

Commentary on architectural blunders in monthly serial.

This insta-cliche of a new WEF-inspired “15-Minute City,” called Telosa, pushed by WalMart e-commerce billionaire Marc Lore, is based on a philosophy he calls “Equitism.” That says it all, if you’re tuned into the finer vibes of Woke utopian megalomania. “We’re on a mission to create a more equitable and sustainable future,” Mr. Lore declares. Sound familiar? “Starting with a clean slate we have this really unique opportunity to focus on what’s really most important…. a new model for society!”

The clean slate is another giveaway. The stuff of history is just so much clutter. Don’t bother with it. We’ll get it just right from inception and the darn thing will run as cleanly and precisely as an atomic clock, a perfect machine-for-living. “Telosa is founded on inclusivity, openness, and fairness,” the promotional video says. But of course: the DEI kit-bag….

This exercise in grand-scale virtue-signaling is in its conceptual development phase. At least a bunch of architects and engineers are getting paid. Believe me, they’re not going to stop this gravy-train with any pain-in-the-ass reality-testing. Enjoy the video. They’re pretending… play-acting. No actual geographical site has been selected. But in so far as it will require 30,000 acres, the choices are pretty slim… mainly desert land so useless that it’s already massively unoccupied.

The backstage machinery behind this fantasy is the usual mash-up of innovative technologies  we’re endlessly hearing about, especially the alt-energy schemes which — sorry — just don’t pencil out, given the ominous state of the oil industry and other hard limits. Mr. Lore and his team clearly have no idea what kind of economy we are actually moving into as The Long Emergency (or Fourth Turning, if you prefer) gathers momentum. It is not going to resemble in the least the kind of computer-generated eye-candy scene depicted above — a society of exquisitely-tuned multicultural leisure. Rather it is going to be a hardscrabble existence somewhere between the The Grapes of Wrath and the Thirty Years War.

If Marc Lore really wants to kick off some equitism, I suggest he forget about this boondoggle and just give fifty-thousand-dollar gift envelopes to as many poor Americans as he can line up before his fortune runs out. At least he’ll give a bunch of people with low impulse-control a few weeks of happiness.

Thanks to Gregory Michaud for the nomination!